12.04.2010

Today I Said to Myself, "With This Ring, I Stay Wed" (OR Something Funny Happened On The Way to the Housewares Department)

OR another, even more appropriate, title for this post might have been, "Today I Committed a Major Marriage Faux-Pas But Look At This Shiny Ring, It's Sooooo Prettttty". No. Really. Lookit -->


The following is going to sound like a whole gob of excuses but hear me out because I think you'll come to the conclusion (one I already know) that I am probably justified in everything I do, today included...

So, my short ring history: I got married 13 years ago (I was a baby!)... we had like $11 to our name, and my engagement ring was small, unfancy, and I picked it out myself (so there's none of that "he chose this for me" sentiment attached to it). After being happily married for about 3 years, I realized I really didn't like my engagement ring at all anymore, so I stopped wearing it. For the next 9.75 years I wore my $40 gold wedding band on my left ring finger. I was totally totally happy with that simple arrangement. But something weird happened about 3 months ago. My effing fingers lost weight! For reals! My thighs? Nope. My arm flab area? Nope. My lovely muffin top? Nope.

Fingers.

And suddenly my little $40 band was slip sliding all over town and I had to stop wearing it. So for 3 months I've been wearing a $10 plastic ring I bought on Ebay years ago as a wedding ring. It's cute, but come ON, it's also adjustable.

So today I took Otto to JC Penney to search out some holiday gifts for the extended fam & friends. We're a little tight on liquid currency these days (I know, and I bought a ring, ugh, I know, I know, shut up) and the good folks at JCP were recently kind enough to extend our credit limit so I'm thinkin: we'll charge it up for holiday gifts and pay it off over the next few months, win/win, everyone's happy! The escalator down to the housewares dept is right by jewelry so I decide to see what a $40 (in 1997) gold band is going for these days... And then I see all these signs that all the jewelry is basically 70% off if you use your JCP card. And then I see this ring that looks antique, and is all filigreed. I kind of hate jewelry and I immediately loved this ring. I had to try it on.

Let me remind you how pretty this ring is -->

 
And here's the part where I committed a major marriage faux-pas. This ring is normally $1100. No typos on that number. I know some of you have $10,000 wedding rings. Not me. Remember, mine was $40. But today, during this doorbuster sale thing that was happening right that minute, the ring was $420. I looked left, I looked right, and then I just up and bought it! Just like that, BAM! DONE! Heart racing, I continued on my quest for a digital picture frame (that this stupid JCP didn't have, not a single one, annoying!).

When we got home my hubs opened the front door to welcome us back and I greeted him with, "I have to tell you something." The look on his face. He didn't have a clue because this ring-buying maniac that I turned into today, that's not me. Not once in our 13 year marriage has that been me. So I told him and he was calm but unhappy. And I was disappointed :( I wanted him to get on the ring bandwagon immediately so I wouldn't feel irresponsible or in any way unsure of my actions. I wanted him to buy into the Ring Fan Club! I mean, it's supposed to represent our commitment to each other, he should approve. But for obvious reasons, he didn't. We're trying to scrape enough money together right now to pay for his grad school applications, the bills, groceries, holidays, and some rockin family pictures (which I'll blog about really soon). I'd acted impetuously and he was not for it. 

So what does this mean? What do you think? I'm keeping the ring. No question there. After 13 years I finally have a pretty wedding ring, squeee! It'll be paid off soon enough and our monthly payments to JPC (which are already budgeted) won't go up, we'll just be paying them for a few more months. But should it matter that Rob didn't choose this ring for me? Or that, right now, he doesn't even like it? I don't know. Really. Thoughts?

Ps. Feel free to tell me how pretty it is.
Pps. Holiday shopping with an almost 2 year old is a complete cardio and muscle workout as well as an exercise in mommy mental torture. How many more times do I have to do this before Christmas? I promise I won't buy myself jewelry every time we go, but it did kind of balance the torture:


-Lindsey

23 comments:

Unknown said...

Love it :) Oh husbands... Good story!

Sweet Harper said...

I say keep it! Wedding rings are something you wear everyday, so if you like it then, that's that. BTW, my ring was not $10,000 either...maybe hubs will take the hint someday and upgrade. Who am I kidding? I will totes have to pull a "Lindsey" and impulse-buy my own!

mamaclare said...

There are so many "rules" about wedding rings and bad luck and good luck and how it is all supposed to go down. I have a haha funny story about my ring that I wear that everyone smiles at laughs at and it's got all the right romance. And then I have another story of the first ring that some people get indignant about and moral and bad luck about (no it wasn't stolen). If you sweat the small stuff, you aren't going to stay married :)

mamaclare said...

Oh, and pretty pretty!

Michael said...

Sorry, but I see where your husband is coming from and understand his issues. I dealt with someone like that before, and it made me feel inadequate in some ways. I realize you see it one way, but I promise, he's seeing it in a totally different light.

OT and ET said...

Thanks for the comments, guys! And for those who complimented the bling, more thanks! If you ever need someone to cut glass for you, you know who to call now :) (me) (yuck, yuck)

Michael, I totally totally see where you and Rob are coming from. I really do. Thank you so much for giving your side. My chief concern was that I would hurt Rob's feelings in some way. But luckily I don't think I did. He's pretty honest about that stuff. We have a good thing going. He's just disappointed in me for being irresponsible when I'm usually the one harping responsibility. (I think, I hope).

CodyGirlScout said...

I remember your wedding; hell I remember the night you met Rob! The love you two have is special and will overcome anything. That being said, I would have done the same thing when I was married, but I wouldn't do it now. I would be dealing with the double doozy of Tris feeling hurt and, maybe worse, her being disappointed that I was irresponsible with money. I would try to talk her into it, saying money is fleeting, but it would never work. Ha! The ring is lovely, it fits you perfectly.

Unknown said...

I love it! Its incredibly gorgeous but you already knew that :)

Dana Sears said...

Oh I like! Screw Hubs quiet grumpiness. Rock that ring Lady!!

Dana Sears said...

Oh I like! Screw Hubs quiet grumpiness. Rock that ring Lady!!

OT and ET said...

Jen - the memories of that year I lived with you (before and after I met Rob) are some of the funnest of my LIFE! We made a great team. You and Tris and your dream life in Northern AZ living on LAND inspires my heart. Love you! And thank you for your comment <3 I can't say I did the "right" thing, but I wouldn't have done it if I thought Rob would be more than passingly disappointed (which he is, he totally is). xoxo

OT and ET said...

Crunchy woman (V, you know I love you) and Dana, thank you guys for the bling love! I'll give my hand a little flick and send a sparkle your way! <3

luv2beanana said...

I love the ring Linz! I do understand Rob, but sometimes we do impulsive things. So once in 13 years of marriage is REALLY GOOD! I do it once a month. hehe The ring is beautiful. Suits you perfectly. I believe he was going to buy you a ring when we were in ND (when you were pregnant) so now he has. You can just pretend it took 2 years to find the perfect ring. Love you.

luv2beanana said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
OT and ET said...

Thank you, Nita! Love you! I can't wait to show it off, haha, I feel like a newly engaged girl who wants to show her ring to everyone.

PoetessWug said...

You have me rolling on the floor laughing!!!.......Nice try! ^_^

OT and ET said...

Haha, Wug! It's been a while! Yep, I aim to amuse. As long as someone can laugh at me or with me, I'm happy :)

Aleksandra Nearing said...

My god, you were a baby!! I'm so glad you got a great deal. It's an awesome ring. Love love love the style, and after 13 years, yes you deserve it. It will all work out and the hubby will hopefully get over it and accept it and the bills will get paid. Love the "acted out of character..." tag LOL

I love diamond jewelry. My last purchase was a (ridiculously yet gloriously) large set of diamond earrings but I think I was more hesitant about the purchase than my husband! We did buy them together at this crazy Jewish-mafia style shop (they were a HOOT, I need to go back there) where the owner just poured out a bunch of diamonds on the desk and we picked out the perfect matching pair. Ahh, it was a fun day. I can't leave home without my diamonds. Gosh, I sound shallow but one day I'll be able to pass them on, right? It's an investment - right?!

calamity ice said...

Bling! Bling! Lindsey, it's a beaute!

OT and ET said...

Aleksandra, I've always wanted to go into one of those Jewish-mafia style diamond shops when I'm in NYC! It's like in a movie! Your earrings sound awesome, too, mama. I'd wear em everywhere too!

Sarah, muah! Thank you! If we're ever trapped together in a glass room I'll so cut our way out! MacGuyver style!

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